Nervous System Regulation in Midlife: Why You Feel Overwhelmed + How to Feel Safe in Your Body with Reshma | Hot Flushes & Higher Self

Welcome & Episode Introduction

0:31 Soraya: So today I'm joined by Reshma, founder of Asai Healing Therapies, an embodied energy healer whose work supports nerve system regulation, safety, and deep reconnection of the body.

0:58 Soraya: Reshma works intuitively with the body's intelligence, supporting women, particularly in midlife and times of transition, to gently release thort stress and return to a more grounded, authentic sense of self.

1:10 Soraya: And she'll also be joining us as a practitioner at our February Self-Love Retreat in a few weeks.

1:15 Soraya: Hi Reshma, welcome to the podcast.

1:19 Reshma: Hi, Soraya.

1:20 Reshma: Thank you so much for having me.

1:22 Reshma: My pleasure.

1:24 Soraya: So for us to start, for listeners who don't know you, just tell us a bit about your journey personally and professionally and what led you into your work of asai healing therapies and embodied energy healing.

1:36 Soraya: But first of all, just let me know what does asai healing therapies, what does it mean to you?

1:41 Soraya: What's the name?

1:44 Reshma: So um I'm Rishma, the founder of Asai Healing Therapies, and Asai, um it comes.

1:52 Reshma: I am a devotee of Sai Baba.

1:55 Reshma: I don't know if you've heard of him.

1:58 Reshma: So he is a spiritual um leader in India, and uh I've been following him, and when I say following, not on Instagram, because that's the kind of uh connotation you have with the word following, but I have been a devotee for many many years, and I wanted his name in my business um name, but I didn't want um that um connection to a specific religion or a specific guru because everything I offer is very science-based and it's nothing to do with any religion.

Reshma’s Journey & Calling

2:44 Reshma: So I then just put an A in front of Sai.

2:48 Reshma: So it's the healing therapies.

2:51 Reshma: Oh, and um, those therapies are open to everyone, so you know it's it's it's no sort of you know uh direction for anyone, like you know, women, men of all faiths.

3:10 Reshma: So that's where the name comes from.

3:13 Soraya: Okay, thank you.

3:14 Soraya: That's really interesting, and um tell us about how you what was your journey like into this type of work.

3:21 Reshma: So I've had um an interesting journey.

3:25 Reshma: I kind of think I should go back a little bit 26 years back.

3:32 Reshma: Um, although I've only started doing what I do for the last couple of years.

3:38 Reshma: But just to give you a bit of history, um 26 years ago, um I fell pregnant with my first child, uh daughter, and at the five-month scan, so we have the three-month scan, the five-month scan.

3:59 Reshma: At the five-month scan, um, they found you know, there were problems, and you know, not going into too much detail, uh, because at the end of the end of the day, this is her journey for her to share.

4:16 Reshma: But you know, we went through Helen Back.

4:21 Reshma: Um, so from that five-month scan, um we were told horrible scenarios about her potential disability and what we could expect, and it wasn't nice.

4:39 Reshma: And at the time I was introduced to somebody who um a Reiki practitioner, and she offered to give me Reiki uh till my due date, uh pro bono, which I took her up on.

4:59 Reshma: So I would go from having scans at Queen Charlotte's hospital, um, which you know um the the consultants would tell me, you know, not nice scenarios, to then going um for my Reiki sessions, and they were and the lady would say, Well, actually, I see completely different, you know.

5:24 Reshma: And we we've gone from my daughter, who effectively we were told might be severely disabled, uh, to potentially still born, to now, where today she's at college.

5:41 Reshma: Um, she is in her final year of a graduate degree in acting.

5:47 Reshma: So we've come a long way, mostly her doing because she is a bit of a fighter and she keeps proving people wrong.

5:57 Reshma: And but saying that, it's not been an easy journey.

6:02 Reshma: Um, you know, she was at Great Ormond Street for the first two years of her life, she's had about 60 surgeries.

6:09 Reshma: Um so it's not been easy, but it's a completely different scenario to what we were told.

6:19 Reshma: So that's my first sort of experience of energy healing.

6:26 Reshma: But over those years, you know, life just took over.

When the Body Begins to Speak

6:31 Reshma: Um, you know, all the stresses and strains of being a full-time carer, um, didn't even sort of think about energy healing.

6:41 Reshma: And then a couple of years back, um, through COVID, again, you know, she found, like a lot of people, she found um, you know, just being locked down in COVID, etc., quite difficult, um, struggled mentally, and you know, had a lot of support from the medical profession, but still not a hundred percent herself.

7:07 Reshma: So I started looking into things, you know, things I could help her with, and I kept thinking there must be something out there where you can just go into a person's head, change a bit of the wiring, and just support them in that way.

7:24 Reshma: And I came across hypnotherapy, um, not even heard of it before.

7:30 Reshma: Um, I went to a taste a day uh in London, um, loved it, loved the teacher, signed up on the day, and that's what's got me to where I am today.

7:43 Reshma: So, from sort of starting to study hypnotherapy, and then once you're on this journey, you then start looking at what else I can learn.

7:53 Reshma: And I thought, okay, I'm gonna learn Reiki, and I have no idea why I didn't do it for the last sort of 26 odd years, but you know, these things happen for a reason and they come about for a reason, and so I um I then looked into um studying Reiki, so I practiced Jikid and Reiki.

8:15 Soraya: So, what type of Reiki was that?

8:17 Speaker 2: Jikidin Reiki.

8:18 Speaker 2: Okay, and um, I will explain the difference, um, and also sound healing, and I'm just on this now.

8:28 Speaker 2: I'm on this spiritual path trying to learn different modalities to support mainly my daughter, uh, myself, because it's been really powerful for myself and uh and family, and now my daughter doesn't need as much time from me, so I thought, okay, I can now maybe do something for myself, which is to help others with what I've learned, and it's been an amazing journey so far, um, you know, with the hypnotherapy, the Reiki, uh, and the sound healing.

9:11 Speaker 2: And uh through Asai Healing Therapies, I'm really passionate about helping carers because I understand how stressful that can be.

9:24 Speaker 2: Um you know, and not just carers, but also women um going through change um because I went through that change while still going through that caring role, and it's a whole new level of stress and anxiety, and um I just completely get it, and I'm just hoping that even if I can help one person, it would be amazing, and to be fair, I've managed to help a few, so you know it's um yeah, I I'm happy that I'm doing what I'm doing to help others.

10:10 Soraya: Yeah, no, so when you say carers, do you mean like what kind of carers do you have?

10:16 Reshma: So carers for me, I feel um, I mean, carers like myself who have maybe children or uh parents with disabilities, but also, you know, I feel um my generation, our generation, we're the sandwich generation, you know, we've got the young families to look after, plus the elderly generation to look after, our parents, and um I classify us as carers, um, you know, people raising young families, it's not easy.

10:52 Reshma: Um, the challenges are different, but you know, the symptoms and the presentation of those challenges are still the same to even just teachers.

11:03 Reshma: Teachers hold space for a lot of children, and you know, again, they are carers in their own capacity, as well as healthcare professionals, you know, they again hold that position where they are looking after others.

11:24 Reshma: So anyone really who holds space and cares for others, I see as carers.

11:31 Soraya: Yeah, and when you mentioned change, are we talking about that women going through like midlife change?

11:37 Soraya: Is that yeah?

11:38 Soraya: Yeah, I think a lot of people underestimate how difficult that is going through that change as well.

11:46 Reshma: Yeah, absolutely.

11:47 Reshma: I mean, you know, my my journey with the change.

11:52 Reshma: Um, if it's the right place to talk about this.

11:56 Soraya: This is the perfect place to talk about hot flushes and higher self, it's all about that new chapter in our lives.

12:02 Soraya: Yeah, please.

12:03 Speaker 2: But again, I'm I'm from a generation where um technology wasn't as available.

12:10 Speaker 2: So yeah, I've been really naive about the menopause, the perimenopause.

12:16 Speaker 2: I did not know anything about this, and you know, I started getting symptoms in my early 40s.

12:23 Speaker 2: And my my symptom, my first symptom was, you know, the missing the period, not being regular, and because I didn't even think about the menopause, I kept um doing pregnancy tests.

12:40 Soraya: I'm laughing because I did exactly the same thing.

12:43 Soraya: I didn't know, I wasn't getting my period.

12:45 Soraya: I thought I was pregnant, and I did semi-pregnancy test.

12:48 Soraya: I thought, no, it must be wrong, it must be wrong.

12:51 Soraya: And I went to the doctor, and then the doctor did the check and said, No, you're in perimenopause.

12:56 Soraya: And I was like, Really?

12:57 Soraya: I'm too young.

12:58 Reshma: Yeah, no, same thing, quite embarrassing, actually.

13:01 Reshma: But yeah, yeah, I could not be here.

13:03 Reshma: Yeah, and then um, and then I did go to the doctor, but they said, you know, the blood test that they do is just a screenshot, so it's no guarantee that you are perimenopausal.

13:17 Reshma: Um, but you know, at the time it showed I was, and then my periods again were regular, and then um I started getting UTIs, really bad ones, really frequently, to the point where um I was passing blood instead of urine, and that wasn't a nice experience, but the sad thing is the GPs did not recognize it as an uh as a symptom of menopause.

13:48 Reshma: So they actually put me on the uh two-week cancer pathway.

13:53 Reshma: Wow.

13:54 Reshma: And um, I had tests, um, you know, bladder uh bladder tests, etc., to just rule out cancer, uh, which luckily it wasn't.

14:06 Reshma: But again, you know, uh lacking in education in the medical profession, you know, and I don't think things have improved since, to be fair.

14:16 Reshma: Um and then um I started, and I was I was coping fine with the hot flushes, the uh sleepless nights, I was managing, but then the anxiety started, and it was next level.

Energy, Emotions & the Physical Body

14:33 Reshma: And I again went back to the GP and I said, What do you think?

14:39 Reshma: Should I go on HRT?

14:41 Reshma: Again, you know, you hear mixed stories about HRT, and I I did a I did some research, but again, I was hoping that the GP would guide me in the right direction, and all I got was if you want to go on there, then just let me know, I'll prescribe it.

14:59 Reshma: There was no advice, there was no guidance, so I did my research and I went on to HRT.

15:07 Reshma: Um, best decision I made.

15:09 Reshma: Um, you know, it really helped with the anxiety and all the other symptoms.

15:15 Reshma: So, you know, yeah, it was that's my journey, you know, not a nice one, but I am over it.

15:22 Reshma: So hallelujah.

15:25 Soraya: So you're postmenopausal now?

15:27 Reshma: I am, yes.

15:29 Soraya: Oh, on the other side.

15:31 Reshma: I am indeed.

15:34 Soraya: Yeah, no, it is a really tricky journey.

15:36 Soraya: As you said, I don't think there's much, you know.

15:39 Soraya: Um the the the people in the medical field are not really trained that way, and the GPs, I mean, to really help you and to guide you.

15:48 Soraya: So it's more about kind of just prescribing you whatever the HRT without actually giving you the options.

15:54 Soraya: So yeah, it's a shame.

15:56 Soraya: I'm hoping that's gonna change.

15:58 Reshma: Well, it is it is a shame because you know, even prior to the HRT, the first thing they gave me was antidepressants.

16:07 Reshma: Um, because as well as you know, anxiety and depression go hand in hand.

16:12 Reshma: Yeah, and you know, so it was, and as soon as I mentioned anxiety, and I and then I was saying I on some days I feel really low, and straight away it was go on antidepressants.

16:27 Reshma: Um so I did because what you know, you don't know any better, right?

16:32 Soraya: Yeah, of course, and I I I feel you know, what you said about the blood and your urine, and they thought it might be cancer, that's so scary to to put you on that as well.

16:44 Reshma: It is scary, and you know, uh the first experience I had of that, it was on a weekend, so you can't really you don't have access to a GP.

16:53 Reshma: So I ended up in an out-of-hour service um to see a GP and um took a sample.

17:01 Reshma: They asked me to take a urine sample.

17:04 Reshma: Yeah, it was blood.

17:05 Reshma: So she actually said, Are you on your period?

17:09 Reshma: And I'm like, I'm not.

17:10 Reshma: This is what I'm passing.

17:12 Reshma: And you could tell from her face, she looked a little bit panicked as well.

17:17 Reshma: So when you get those kind of reactions, it's quite frightening.

17:21 Reshma: So, you know, going from there to have being on that cancer pathway, uh you know, yeah, and then finally I was just menopause.

17:31 Reshma: Yeah, yeah.

17:32 Reshma: And to be fair, you know, it's not just menopause because that's just a whole next level of as compared to cancer, it's you know, yeah, yeah, absolutely.

17:43 Soraya: It's horrible that you have to go through that, yeah.

17:47 Reshma: Considering I was already anxious and stressed, yeah, you know, that's awful.

17:54 Soraya: Um, yeah, so going back to the midlife and life transitions, so how does midlife often invite deeper embodiment and deeper in inner listening?

18:07 Soraya: I know obviously we have like the anxiety, the depression, you know, urine infections, but other than that, like emotionally, how do you feel that women are kind of like going more inwards in midlife?

18:21 Speaker 2: Well, from my personal experience, um as I've um aged, got older, I've learned to connect more with my body, yeah, and I listen to my body more, and that's really helped.

18:44 Speaker 2: And the other thing, you know, as as you get older, you kind of then don't really care what others think, right?

18:53 Speaker 2: And that's that's been a big game changer because now when I when I'm doing something or uh thinking about something, even thinking about myself, I always in the past used to look at myself from others' perspective, right?

Nervous System Safety & Regulation

19:18 Speaker 2: And I've now turned it inward.

19:21 Speaker 2: So it's more what am I happy with?

19:24 Speaker 2: Am I happy with what I'm doing?

19:27 Speaker 2: Um, rather than am I doing the right thing?

19:30 Speaker 2: Will how will they judge me?

19:32 Speaker 2: And you know, so the thought process has changed over time, you know, and I now have boundaries.

19:42 Speaker 2: If I'm not happy doing something, I will say no.

19:46 Speaker 2: So in that way, and it it's it's not just aging, I guess it's just experience from life and learning.

19:56 Speaker 2: So that's that's been kind of the biggest change, you know, the mindset and um creating those boundaries.

20:06 Soraya: Yeah, I think especially for women in general, we are more people pleasers, so I do find that as well, as you kind of get older and go through that transition, you do let go of that need to always please others and actually see what you want.

20:20 Speaker 2: Yeah, absolutely.

20:21 Speaker 2: And it it is life-changing once you change the mindset, and that's that's also something I when I work with my clients, I kind of try and um teach them in still to have that self-love and self-respect because it's just so powerful, you know, and when you have self-love, you just attract the right people, the right situations, you know, people who are actually gonna bolster you rather than put you down, yeah.

21:02 Speaker 2: So it uh yeah, yeah, it's really powerful.

21:07 Soraya: So yeah, I think it's kind of through the energy, right?

21:10 Soraya: It's the the frequency you're giving out once you have that inside that kind of your frequency changes and then you attract more better things coming towards you, right?

21:20 Soraya: There's a science behind that as well.

21:21 Soraya: I'm not just saying we move stuff.

21:24 Reshma: No, and I completely agree, which is why I said everything I do is science-based.

21:29 Reshma: Reiki, yes, it's got a spiritual connotation, but Reiki is again resonance, right?

21:38 Reshma: We're all energy, yeah.

21:41 Reshma: And uh we all have these vibrations that we um, you know, we have certain frequencies we vibrate at, which is you know what makes us who we are, you know, and our health the way it is.

21:59 Reshma: And when that misaligns, that's when you start feeling out of sorts.

22:05 Reshma: And modalities like Reiki, which is, I guess, you know, resonance-based.

22:13 Reshma: You know, by that I mean systems, they interact with each other and they influence one another.

22:22 Reshma: And Reiki just allows to create that balance.

22:28 Reshma: Uh, and same with sound healing.

22:31 Reshma: You know, again, sound healing is based on vibrations used to realign um cells within our body to bring about the healing.

22:44 Reshma: I think there was an experiment done um where they had, I think it was like 47 of those metronome things, you know, the timers, the ones that you use to kind of um create uh create beats and whatever.

23:04 Reshma: I think it's I've seen my daughter use it for her piano, etc.

23:09 Reshma: And um these these uh metronomes, they were all um triggered at different times, so they were all disaligned, but as they carried on over time, they all came into alignment and they were all then ticking along at the same pace, and that shows you know that's how energy works, so it's really powerful.

23:36 Soraya: No, completely.

23:37 Soraya: And so how can energy healing support women navigating per menopause or menopause and identity shifts?

23:46 Reshma: So everything I do works on our nervous system, yeah.

23:54 Reshma: So menopause, when we say um, you know, we're struggling with anxiety, for example, you know, anxiety effectively is our nervous system not being able to come out of the fight, flight, freeze response.

24:16 Soraya: Yeah.

24:18 Reshma: And energy healing kind of works with our nervous system and just allows us to calm down and takes us out of that stress response so that we're calmer, and that then helps heal all those symptoms that we experience, like anxiety, like the stress, like the hot flushes, it it just calms the nervous system down, and and that's how the healing happens.

Midlife as an Invitation Inward

24:54 Soraya: What patterns do you notice when women begin reconnecting with themselves after years of prioritizing others, people pleasing?

25:04 Reshma: So with ongoing um therapies like mine, yeah, I find women are more centered, more grounded, and tend to prioritize themselves first.

25:19 Reshma: And it's quite sad, you know, when they when they come to me or healers like ourselves, they're at breaking point, you know, and they kind of are desperate, which is such a shame because if people understood that these modalities we use, if they kind of um instill them early on, they wouldn't even get to that stage.

25:50 Reshma: Um sadly, you know, what we offer is sometimes seen as woo-woo, um and it's seen as a luxury rather than a necessity.

26:02 Reshma: And you know, so when uh when I sort of work with people, they tend to sort of just be more calmer, more grounded, and when you're in that space, you then respond to situations better rather than just react to them.

26:24 Reshma: You know, you're not um you're not reactive, you're more proactive.

26:30 Reshma: So it's um I I feel it just really supports uh women to be more grounded, more present, and then start looking after them and their well-being and created that so create that self-love, which is so powerful.

26:50 Soraya: Yeah, I always I like to compare it to um a car, a really beautiful car, a great car, unless you're putting the oil in and the water, doesn't matter how great the car is, it's gonna break down.

27:01 Speaker 2: So we need to take care of ourselves, especially yeah, that's a great analogy.

27:06 Soraya: Yeah, women, mothers, we have so many roles that we play.

27:11 Soraya: We need to really take care of ourselves and replenish our cups.

27:15 Soraya: Otherwise, we can't give.

27:17 Speaker 2: Well, you can't pour from an empty cup, exactly.

27:20 Speaker 2: So it it yeah, uh, if you don't look after yourself, and I've learned the hard way to be fair.

27:27 Speaker 2: My whole um journey as a carer, it's um it's always been guilt-based.

27:35 Speaker 2: So I've always felt so guilty if I spend time on myself.

27:40 Speaker 2: Um if um you know, just taking 10 minutes out right at the beginning, it was it was hard because I felt, you know, everything's gonna fall apart if I just sit for 10 minutes.

27:53 Speaker 2: You know, I have to be on the go the whole time.

27:55 Speaker 2: And my nervous system took a huge hit.

27:59 Speaker 2: Um so I'm very guilty of that.

28:02 Speaker 2: Um, but as I've started on this spiritual journey and the healing journey and using the modalities I use on myself, I give myself Reiki every day, um, I practice grounding every day, and it's really helped me.

28:22 Speaker 2: So now I don't feel guilty when I'm you know having a 30-minute walk outside in nature because that's what's good for me, and I get that now.

28:34 Speaker 2: But if you said to me that sort of 20 years ago, even just five years ago, and I would have gone, no, no, no, no, I need to get this done, this done.

28:44 Speaker 2: I need to be here in case somebody needs me.

28:47 Speaker 2: So I have learned the hard way.

28:50 Speaker 2: Um, but I'm hoping that you know I can teach from my experience.

28:59 Soraya: Yeah, no, I I get that.

29:01 Soraya: Um I'm the same, and it's just to remind ourselves that we need to take time out just to take care of ourselves, and it's not you know anything extravagant.

29:09 Soraya: I think it's not about going get a facial, get your hair done, but it's just about taking time out, like you said, even going outside for a walk or just sitting in silence for like 10 minutes.

29:19 Soraya: We need that to be able to give.

29:23 Reshma: Yeah, no, I am completely.

29:25 Reshma: I mean, having a facial or a massage was not even on my radar, you know.

29:31 Reshma: It was like no, and you know, it comes from this thing of um not deserving, feeling like you don't not don't deserve it, and you know, you should be just working the whole time.

29:44 Reshma: And yeah, it's it's definitely helped change that around for me.

29:50 Reshma: Um, you know, the the all the energy healing and and self-hypnosis as well, which I practice regularly, and it's been really powerful, you know, just instilling calm and confidence, and one and that's one of the things I do with my clients.

30:06 Reshma: So for me, it's never about you know asking people to keep coming back to see me, you know, for hip hypnotherapy.

Releasing Conditioning & Self-Doubt

30:16 Reshma: I actually um once I know a person is in a good place, they're able to hold a trance, I teach them um self-hypnosis, and so then they can go and start supporting their own well-being.

30:34 Reshma: So, yeah, yeah, really, really good.

30:39 Soraya: Yeah, I know, I absolutely.

30:41 Soraya: I mean, I also do hypnotherapy, and I I believe you know that the mind is so powerful, our subconscious mind.

30:47 Soraya: So just being in that relaxed state of relaxation and be able to take those suggestions, and you know, our minds can be our worst enemy or our best friend.

30:58 Reshma: Absolutely, absolutely, and it's up to us which way we want it to go.

31:03 Soraya: Yeah, which is really empowering.

31:04 Soraya: I feel once once you realize that you can flip it over and actually use it for your advantage.

31:10 Soraya: So, yeah.

31:11 Soraya: Um, speaking about self-love, you'll be joining us at the retreat, the self-love retreat in a few weeks.

31:18 Soraya: I'm really looking forward to welcoming you then.

31:20 Soraya: Well, can you share a bit about what you'll be offering?

31:25 Soraya: I know you'll be working together with Crystal, she'll be doing the um energy healing, and you'll be doing a soundbath, correct?

31:34 Reshma: Yes, yeah, absolutely.

31:35 Reshma: So, yeah, as um as part of my sound healing, I facilitate sound baths.

31:42 Reshma: I also use sound healing um on a one-to-one basis using tuning forks around your energy field.

31:51 Reshma: And um, and I've got the signature therapy, which is where I use sound healing in a session, followed by um Jickadin Reiki.

32:02 Reshma: And that is such a powerful session.

32:06 Reshma: But thank you for inviting me to the retreat.

32:10 Reshma: Look really looking forward to it.

32:11 Reshma: So I'll be facilitating a sound bath.

32:14 Reshma: Um, I love a sound bath, they are so relaxing, so therapeutic.

32:20 Reshma: And um Kristen and I have um putting our heads together because you know it is about self-love, and the hardest thing about self-love is we have those blockages, you know, those those thoughts, those ingrained thoughts and behaviors from past, and you know, perhaps, you know, looking at ourselves from others' eyes.

32:52 Reshma: And so what we're planning is um Kristen and I will be working together, she will be um delivering uh meditation um to release any blocks that we have, and then we will go into a sound bath uh where I I usually I all not usually I always set an intention for my sound bath sessions.

33:20 Reshma: So for this one it will be to instill and help with self-love, and then um whilst Crystal is going to go around giving Reiki, and then we're gonna end uh the plan is uh time allowing is we're gonna end with me using a little bit of hypnotherapy to kind of instill those ideas.

33:46 Reshma: It's you know, crystals release those blocks, and I then go in and almost kind of instill those ideas and um make them stick, so it allows um people to access self-love more easily.

34:04 Soraya: So that's great, yeah.

34:06 Soraya: Yeah, it sounds like wonderful.

34:09 Soraya: I mean, yeah, like you said, the sound buffs are amazing because the best things you literally, like you said in your video, you just lie there and receive.

34:16 Reshma: Exactly, exactly.

34:17 Reshma: You don't need to even believe, do anything, lie there and let the vibrations wash over you, and they are relaxing and so therapeutic.

34:28 Reshma: I've had some amazing feedback, um, you know, from previous ones.

34:33 Reshma: So, yeah, everyone's in for a treat.

34:36 Soraya: Sounds great, thank you.

34:38 Soraya: And so, how does healing in the retreat or collective space differ from one-to-one work?

34:42 Soraya: Because I know you do both.

34:43 Soraya: How do you feel different?

34:46 Reshma: So, um, with group work, it's just a different energy, you know.

34:52 Reshma: So, you know, regardless of who and how many are in the group, everyone brings their own energy.

34:59 Reshma: And also, you know, when people share, you know, individuals then don't feel alone, you know.

35:09 Reshma: So they are they kind of it's it's almost a comforting thing to know that you're not the only one going through what you're going through.

35:18 Reshma: But when you're when you're isolated almost, and I'm kind of just looking at it from a from the perspective of a carer, and you know, going through that journey, and you know, sadly again, I didn't go to support groups and I didn't really engage in any groups, and I did feel isolated, and group work just allows you to feel supported, whereas one one-to-one is more powerful in a different way, you know.

Embodied Healing in Retreat Spaces

35:53 Reshma: The sessions are tailored specifically to what you need, and um and so you know that healing is more powerful from a different perspective.

36:06 Soraya: Okay, so they're both powerful in their own different ways.

36:10 Soraya: Absolutely.

36:11 Soraya: What intentions do you you most hope women will carry with them after your sessions?

36:20 Reshma: The biggest thing I think I want women to um, and I keep going back to this, but to just learn to love themselves.

36:31 Reshma: Um, because self-love is so powerful.

36:36 Reshma: Uh I just finished uh reading a book, I don't know if you've read it, um Dying to Be Me by Anita Marujani.

36:47 Reshma: It's um it's her experience of her NDE, her near-death experience.

36:56 Reshma: And the biggest thing that I I got out of it, and and the biggest message that she is trying to deliver, and something I want to sort of instill with your listeners is you know, love yourself like your life depends on it, you know, because self-love raises those vibrations to a level where you then almost you know not only attract the right energies to you, but repel anything that isn't for your highest good, you know.

37:41 Reshma: So, you know, illnesses, diseases, etc.

37:44 Reshma: So, you know, if anything from this talk we're having, you know, uh if your listener is going to take away anything, it would be I would love for them to just take away that self-love is so important.

38:00 Soraya: Hmm, yeah.

38:01 Soraya: I mean, it's it's easy for us to say that, but like you said, it is a healing journey, and there's a lot of different trauma that people might be going through, and it's about seeing a practitioner that works for them to help them release that baggage and to be able to actually, like you said, love themselves because that is that is the main key.

38:21 Reshma: It is, it's not the easiest uh thing to do, and it takes time because we always, and I you know, I'm again guilty of it, you know, I'm a people pleaser, I always look at myself from others' eyes.

38:39 Reshma: Not not so much now, but I have you know, consistently in the past.

38:47 Reshma: So that you know the healing modalities, you know, that I use, and you know, and I also sort of reach out to other healers because healers need healing, and you know, and so and they've really supported me.

39:03 Reshma: So now, you know, but it is an ongoing journey, and it's not going to be okay, today I'm gonna love myself, and now forever I'm gonna do that because you have good days by bad days like anything else, and it is a journey, you know.

39:20 Reshma: So, yeah.

39:22 Soraya: Yeah, and so how has your understanding of purpose evolved through different life stages?

39:29 Reshma: Initially, my my purpose, I felt, was to be that carer, to hold that space for others, not just for my daughter, but you know, the the family.

39:43 Reshma: And as time has moved on and I've moved on, that's now changed, and I now understand that if I don't look after myself, I I can't look after others, and it's taken many years and a lot of stress and illness and all sorts to understand that.

Reshma’s Role at the February Self-Love Retreat

40:10 Reshma: But you know, so my purpose, I guess, has gone from being external to now being internal, and by doing that, I'm actually able to do what I used to do in more of a positive way, yeah.

40:29 Reshma: With your cup filled, cup is filled, yes, pouring from a filled cup now, yeah.

40:37 Soraya: That's good.

40:38 Soraya: And what does living in the alignment of your body and intuition look like day-to-day now?

40:44 Reshma: So I feel um just being just aligning our nervous system to be in a good place, so not being in a in that fight flight response the whole time that is so powerful because when you're calm, you can just respond to all the different strains and stresses in life in a more positive way.

41:21 Reshma: So, you know, I feel like your nervous system is the key to being um in a good place, in a positive place.

41:33 Reshma: So that's where the alignment comes from.

41:36 Soraya: And so, for listeners, have you got a tip that they can use, um, like something practical to kind of regulate the nervous system on a day-to-day basis when they're feeling overwhelmed?

41:48 Reshma: Yeah, so I I actually have a really um powerful technique that I use myself, and I've taught a few people now, and I do teach my clients, and I practice this every day, and I encourage people to do this morning and evening, but whenever you feel that you need um need to just rebalance yourself.

42:12 Reshma: So I uh and it's something I learned from a lady called um Bo Maxwell, she's uh a spiritual well-being leader, quite well known.

Integration, Alignment & Living in the Body

42:25 Reshma: And so it's called ground clear protect.

42:30 Reshma: So, first thing in the morning, I will just sit, take a few deep breaths in and ground myself.

42:38 Soraya: Okay, let's do this now, if you don't mind, Rashima.

42:40 Soraya: So listeners can try it at home.

42:42 Reshma: Yeah, absolutely.

42:43 Reshma: So just um sit comfortably, feet on the floor, and um just relax and take a few deep breaths in through your nose, releasing out through your mouth.

42:58 Reshma: So just breathing in relaxation and calm, and breathing out any unnecessary tension, and then as you're sitting there relaxing, first of all, I'd like you to uh ground yourself and the way to do this and different techniques work for different people.

43:25 Reshma: So imagine um, for example, you can imagine uh roots growing from the soles of your feet and entering Mother Earth and allow them to just go really deep through all the different layers of earth, completely grounding you.

43:49 Reshma: And you can even perhaps feel some beautiful flowers growing around your feet.

43:55 Reshma: Um that technique works really well.

43:59 Reshma: Well, for me, but you could equally use imagine um iron pillars growing from the base of your feet, or perhaps you've got a rope tied around your waist, which is really a thick, strong rope that you can then just allow to enter the earth and really center yourself.

44:25 Reshma: So whatever really works for you, and then once you've grounded yourself, imagine one of the elements uh so fire, water, wind, earth, whatever again that you connect with.

44:44 Reshma: And for example, I use water and I imagine water flowing into me from the top of my head and all the way down through my body.

44:59 Reshma: So when I say body, not just my physical body, but my energetic body.

45:07 Reshma: So the energetic body is effectively our soul because we are all souls experiencing uh a physical body.

45:21 Reshma: So washing through our bodies, the energetic body, the physical body, and our programming body, which is basically our mind.

45:32 Reshma: And as the water moves through, it takes with it anything that doesn't belong to us, that we've picked up by interacting with our environment.

45:45 Reshma: So anything that isn't for our highest good and takes it and it releases it into Mother Earth and flows into Mother Earth.

45:54 Reshma: And then any gaps that that leaves you can fill with white white light, which is love.

46:06 Reshma: Just fill all that space up, imagine it filling up with love with white light.

46:14 Reshma: And now the third stage is protecting your energy.

46:21 Reshma: And so imagine a bubble around you and this could be made of any material latex, plastic to iron, can be as thick as you need it to be, depending on what it is uh that you're protecting yourself from.

46:41 Reshma: So if you're experiencing if you're anticipating a very stressful day, maybe make it a little bit thicker.

46:47 Reshma: But have this bubble around you and say to yourself, please allow in energy and anything that is for my highest good.

47:01 Reshma: But keep out of anything and reflect it back with love.

47:07 Reshma: Anything that isn't for my highest good.

47:11 Reshma: And it sounds like it's a long time that you do this for, but with practice it takes 30 seconds to a minute.

47:19 Reshma: And when you do this morning, evening, it's so powerful.

47:26 Reshma: So yeah, I I it's a really, really powerful technique, and again, it's it's a way to allow you to be more present and allow you to respond rather than react in situations.

47:44 Soraya: I'm feeling quite relaxed, Reshma.

47:46 Soraya: I just open my eyes.

47:48 Soraya: Ah, I'm glad.

47:50 Soraya: Thank you.

47:51 Soraya: That's really um, you know, a great back, I think, for some women who might be feeling quite stressed, so just to sit there, like you said, for a minute and just visualize it's um, yeah.

48:02 Soraya: Thank you.

48:04 Soraya: What's lighting up most in your work at the moment, Rashima?

48:09 Reshma: Well, it has to be the change I see in my clients.

48:14 Reshma: It's um, you know, just as an example, um recently I had somebody who came in for some weight loss hypnotherapy, and we had a few sessions, but what came out of it was that um, you know, the client was actually hadn't dealt with the grief of losing their sister, and that was what was causing the way she was feeling.

Gentle Practices & Takeaways

48:54 Reshma: So just putting aside you know the eating habits, etc., um, it just really, really helped her to let go and release that grief, and everything else just followed.

49:10 Reshma: So when you see those, um, you know, those changes, uh, they're really powerful.

49:17 Reshma: And you know, yeah, I I that's what I enjoy the most, you know, just seeing people heal and feel better, and kind of just feels like you know, this is my purpose.

49:30 Soraya: Yeah.

49:31 Soraya: And I always like to ask two questions to my guests.

49:35 Soraya: Number one, what's your body or intuition been teaching you lately?

49:40 Reshma: To actually just listen to my body, you know, and um look after myself, like we've said before.

49:49 Reshma: You can't feel, you know, pour from an empty cup.

49:54 Reshma: And so I've learned that listen to my body and have those boundaries, don't say yes to everything, and learn to say no when it doesn't feel right, and that's that's a big lesson.

50:12 Soraya: And last question what does living as your limitless self mean to you right now?

50:19 Reshma: I think being limitless is acknowledging that we are all one and we are here to support each other.

50:32 Reshma: Like I said earlier, you know, we are all souls here to experience life as physical beings, but we all come from that one source, and so by recognizing that and understanding that, I think we can support each other in a better way because what I see in myself, I should be able to see in you because we are one and the same, and and that again is just such a powerful understanding.

51:14 Soraya: Yeah, no, absolutely, and I think it's also you know, when you say it that way, it's also about people have to remember to be kind to one another.

51:22 Soraya: It's right, I think people sometimes forget that and they're just kind of looking at themselves.

51:28 Soraya: But when you phrase it the way you have that we're all coming from the same source, one of the same, aren't we?

51:34 Soraya: That collective consciousness.

51:36 Reshma: Absolutely, and so you know, and again it comes down to uh treat others like you'd like to be treated, right?

51:45 Reshma: So, yeah, be kind.

51:48 Soraya: Yeah, thank you so much, Reshma, for today.

51:52 Soraya: It's been really interesting, and I'm so looking forward to having to for you to join us at the retreat in a few weeks.

51:58 Reshma: So excited, looking forward to it.

Closing Reflections

52:01 Reshma: Thank you for having us.

52:03 Soraya: Pleasure to speak to you, Reshma.

52:05 Soraya: Thank you.

52:06 Soraya: Bye.

52:07 Soraya: #